Last week, we saw how tactfully and gracefully I handled becoming BEST FRIENDS with NBA star, and probable future Hall of Famer, Matt Carroll… This week for my #tbt I wanted to throw it back to a true “what could have been” moment in my life – the perfect woman.

This lovely lady won my heart on The Bachelor when Chris Soules LIKE AN IDIOT decided to not pick my gurl and let her get away.
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My bae’s name? Jade Roper (Tolbert)!!

She and I had a few Twitter back-and-forth’s during the show, but none more memorable than this wonderful Twitter masterpiece:


Obviously a picture like that HAS to grab a superstar-like-her’s attention and did it ever! I had lots of people tell me she probably responded thinking I was special needs or whatever but still… #NAILEDIT!!

After that, we had a brief SnapChat romance (mostly because I had just gotten a puppy, and what babe wouldn’t want in on that action?) but nothing too graphic in SnapChat (honestly, good for me).

Jade, I know wherever you are in life, you are absolutely killin’ it… And hey, whenever you decide that sham of a marriage you got goin’ is dunzo – you know where to hit me up!