I wouldn’t call myself anything close to a “sneakerhead” – I didn’t even think it was cool when Turtle had his Fukuyama craze in Entourage… and Turtle was cool as shit.

But these new Nike kicks are pretty fucking cool – self lacing?? I could get into that!!

Over the years I’ve worn some RETARDED looking shoes, some that I had to tie ALL BY MYSELF!! And now this takes that COMPLETE hassle out of my hands.

Thanks to Nike, we can do one less task that we thought was something we’ll always have to do ourselves, like watch our dogs  when you let them out or jerk off.

Anyways, I like the direction we’re headed in as a human race. We’re really “Making Earth Great Again”.

Idiocracy middle finger mike jude



Stupidly Lacing Since 1990,