Well, I wrote recently on Eddie Lacy’s new deal with the Seahawks and how I thought it was a great deal for both sides – Eddie gets a chance to prove himself, and Seattle gets a potentially great running back on the (fairly) cheap.

Today, I learned there was a “weight clause” in his contract. He needs to maintain a certain weight in order for $100k in incentives to pay out… THIS. IS. GENIUS!!!

excited fat beard smart genius

I think this should revolutionize sports. If this isn’t already in most contracts, it should be.

I can remember showing up to (college D2 swimming, nbd) Day 1 in various different shapes. Some years I was on the ball, took steroids (and Super Pump 250) all summer and your boy Taylor was on fleek… Other years, I drank Four Loko’s all summer and showed up looking like I spent the last 3 months getting smashed in the head with a  baseball bat.

What I’m saying is – had someone told me there was a $100k incentive there – YEAR AFTER YEAR I would’ve shown up in great shape. Shit, at that point in time it could’be been like $500!

Listen, money drives this world and there’s no two ways about it. Take that $16 million contract the Eagles gave Alshon Jefrey (LOL) and throw like a $200k incentive in there to make sure he’s in shape and BANG of course he is. Who wants to miss out on a “free” $200k just for staying in shape WHICH YOU SHOULD ANYWAY AS A PROFESSIONAL ATHLETE!!

Listen, I think this could make Eddie Lacy (and lots of other fat athletes) great again, this could make the NFL great again, and this could make sports great again.



All About This Fat Clause,