McDonalds. Everyone loves it after a hangover, or while drunk because, well, it’s greasy and it “keeps you full, keeps you focused.” Nah that’s not right. Either way, they just launched about 3 new sandwiches that are supposed to be like artisan burgers.

Now, I’m sorry, I’m not going to McDonalds to get a grilled chicken sandwich with guacamole. THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS MCDONALDS! I go to your eatery when I have little or no money, its 11:30 pm or later, and I need a double cheeseburger, a McChicken (optional upgrade, spicy McChicken), and a medium fry so I can make a McGangbang with an absurd amount of fries that should be a large, not a medium.

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But yeah, those sandwiches aren’t even the most ridiculous part! The fast food giant created a thing called the “Frork” which is basically a plastic thing, in the shape of a fork, minus the tines. And then you put French-fries in it. This is to help mop up all of the sauces that fall off of burgers. They know it’s ridiculous so that’s actually pretty good. Personally, I think that the sandwiches will fail, but the Frork will become a huge success.

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE!

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You heard it right – Anthony Sullivan, the 2nd best “As Seen on TV” guy (behind the late great Billy Mays) is their spokesman! Sullivan graced our television screens for years showing us the power of Oxi-Clean. Now, personally I never purchased any, but I always wanted to come home after a baseball game and throw my uniform in a giant transparent tub and swirl it around just to see if it actually worked (Is that weird? I don’t care! #YOLO).

So the Frork, it’s ridiculous, but enjoy (THAT should be their tagline).

RIP Billy Mays.

Ragu, out