This morning, the Preakness Valley Golf Course and Water Cooler Sports have officially decided that the West Course will be the best place for July 22’s big extravaganza.
It features 5,763 yards of a beautiful rolling course. And as this is “Freedom Week” I don’t want to harp on the charity part of this event… Why? Because America is a “ME” country, so let’s talk about the prizes all of you can walk away with!
With four Par 3’s we will be able to feature plenty of Hole-in-One prizes, including a cash prize, a 39″ Sharp LCD TV, a pair of round-trip airline tickets AND a set of Callaway Irons!! Let’s walk through the course and see where exactly our prizes will be coming from on the big day (you know, so you can start to visualize your shots)…
As you can see on the front 9, just a tremendous course with challenges on every hole, buuuuut also big opportunities to hit big.
Hole 6. The first prize hole, will also be an “Event Hole.” This will be a simple Par 3 and feature our first Hole-in-One prize: a set of Callaway Irons, if you can sink the shot… But that’s only half the fun.
This hole will also be a Hawaiian themed hole, with a friendly gentlemen’s wager. We’ll have some event staff on Hole #6 ready and willing to bet each golfer $5 that they can’t hit the green. Golfers don’t have to accept the bet, but can if they’re feeling frisky. Any money (above “break-even”) that the event staffer wins, will be added to the Movember donation… Any money the golfer wins can go right in their pocket! It’s really a win-win for everyone here. Friendly small stakes gambling (win) and even if everyone sucks – the winnings go to the cause (win) #FuckCancer!
Hole 7. Immediately following that hole will be our Par 5 503-yard hole. This is where the “Chicks Dig the Long Ball” Contest will take place. We will have a marker for how far the longest drive goes, and there will be one winner announced on this one at the end when we all have plenty of beverages in our system. Could very likely be a trophy – details to follow based on public reaction here.
Hole 8. Jesus, rapid fire on these three holes, eh?? Another Par 3, which means a Hole-in-One prize is again in play. This prize here will be two (2) round-trip airline tickets to anywhere in the Continental US. This one is a simple 158-yarder, basically a chip shot… God, I sincerely hope Water Cooler Sports sends someone and their bae on a trip somewhere LOLOL.
Hole 13. This is the big kahuna. This is the Grand Prize 157-yard Par 3. Sink a Hole-in-One, walk home* with $11,679 in cash!! Why that number? Excellent question astute Water Cooler Sports fan! Well, we at Water Cooler Sports aren’t just here to make sure you win a prize, only to give a big cut of your money away to the government! HELL NO!! So, we did the only logical thing. We made sure the cash prize was big enough, that even after you withhold about 15% (yeah, I’m assuming none of you are paying TOO high a tax bracket), you’ll still walk away with $10k of legit “you can spend it all” prize money.
(You can thank Dan Arno, tax professor at Le Moyne College, for that forward thinking!!)
Hole 17. Our last Par 3 of the day is a bomb… BUT a straightaway. If you can sink this one, the prize here is a 39″ Sharp LCD TV. Not a bad prize to bring home I’d say!
Hole 19. After all is said and done, we will total up the scores, and see what team had the lowest combined, and what individual had the best score out of the field of 40 golfers, and award them their prizes. We also will have our Movember “Big Check Ceremony” which will be amazing… easily a Top-10 moment of my life to date.
Oh, and lastly, this will be where ten 30’s of a variety of light beers will await us, and plenty of grilled meats to refuel properly… Essentially everyone’s grand prize!
Alright, well I wanted to make sure everyone is getting as pumped as I am for July 22, and hopefully this helped. Godspeed on training for the big day…
157-Yards to “Financial Freedom“,
* = I can all but guarantee you won’t actually “walk home” with it… But you’ll win the money. I will be helping you 100% of the way with the claims process from HoleInOneInsurance.com. That alone will be fucking WILD to me, LOLOLOL!!!