Sharknado 5: Global Swarming was unveiled (…) as official title for Syfy’s latest orgy of excess, debuting August 6 and airing in more than 100 countries. The tagline for this next exercise in high-camp hate-watching: “Make America Bait Again!”

Syfy Summer Slate: (…) ‘Sharknado 5’ (…) Fabio will play the pope, Charo has been cast as queen of England, and Chris Kattan is the British PM. Gilbert Gottfried will play storm chaser Ron McDonald, and Today veterans Al Roker, Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb will appear as, well, themselves in the project. Also cast in cameos are Clay Aiken, Tony Hawk, Olivia Newton-John, Bret Michaels and Margaret Cho as a fussy bride whose honeymoon is interrupted by sharks.

The fifth edition’s name and tagline are the result of a social initiative launched in April, in which Syfy says it invited Facebook users to submit their ideas via interactive bot.

In this latest iteration, the mission gets personal for Fin Shepard (Ian Ziering) and his bionic wife, April (Tara Reid), when their young son gets trapped in a traveling ‘nado and transported all over the world. From London to Rio, Tokyo, Rome and Amsterdam, the heroes seek assistance from royals, scholars, Olympians and news talking heads in their epic battle.


Well, here we are… Sharknado 5.


Amazing. A movie that should not have gone past one is now a big enough joke that America will be on their FIFTH of the series… I legit remember watching the first one, thinking “Good God, this is hilariously terrible” and now, we are now being rewarded with our FOURTH after that!

We need to stop supporting jokes as much as we do… This is kinda how Trump got into office. If jokes get enough momentum they’re impossible to stop… KINDA LIKE A TORNADO WITH SHARKS FLYING AROUND IN IT!!

A couple items I want to highlight that shouldn’t go un-noticed…

  • The catch-phrase “Make America Bait Again” is amazing… But when did people stop baiting? (Get it??)
  • Tara Reid is now someone’s “bionic wife” – wtf does that mean?
  • Fabio will play the pope. Amazing.
  • BRET MICHAELS. That is all.

Image result for bret michaels gif

I know I said we can’t give jokes like this momentum but when they throw this star-power at us in such a ridiculous fashion, it’s hard not to! Guess I know what I’ll be doing on August 6!!



Make America Bait Again,