How’s it going everyone? This is my first article with Water Cooler Sports. That being said I’m going to introduce myself – my name is Kettle and we’re gonna talk about some fucking hockey.
To begin, my favorite team is the New York Rangers. My main man on that team is Henrik Lundqvist. He’s an absolute animal on and off the ice… I mean, have you seen the man?
By far the best looking dude in the NHL. The man probably fucks every night of his life.
In my mind, he’s one of the Top 5 goalies in the league. Yea, yea, yea, you can sit there and say he had an “all right regular season” – but he performed in the playoffs and come on… And that’s all that really matters.
Braden Holtby had a god tier regular season with a 2.0 GAA and a 92.5 Sv%… That being said he had a 90.9 Sv% and a 2.4 GAA in the playoffs. So he didn’t really perform in the playoffs, even when he had the offense to back him up. All those numbers don’t seem like a huge margin when it comes down to it, but in the game of hockey that’s pretty big.
On the other hand, my man – the king – Hank had a 91.0 Sv% and a 2.74 GAA this past regular season – with only two shutouts. Not as impressive as Holtby’s nine shutouts, but still good. Buuuut when it came down to it – in the playoffs for Lord Stanley’s cup – Hank had a Sv% of 92.7, while Holtby had .909 Sv%.
Nothing against the Caps or Holtby, just making comparisons and backing my argument that you can have a shitty regular season – and all that matters is that you perform when it matters. Hank did that.
A little more about me, I FUCKING HATE SYDNEY CROSBY. Holy fuck. Don’t get me wrong the man is absolute filth at hockey, like for gods sake he was fighting a man off on one leg and one hand backhanded it top cheese (if you wanna find out how hard that is, I suggest you go to your nearest ice rink and try it out… that is if you can even fucking skate).
Putting his hockey skills aside, I have no respect for him as player. He’s a pussy. He can’t fight or hit so he cheap shots people all over the ice to get back at them instead of chucking knucks like a damn man. Also, he might be a worse flopper than Lebron James. The man takes dives like it’s his fucking God given duty. Then has to audacity to ask for a penalty every hit… Honestly I could go on forever but I think I’ll stop there for my first article.
Hopefully I can spit out some good shit on here, or I might fail miserably, who knows – stay tuned to find out!!