We’ve all heard the and seen the public meltdown Antonio Brown has had over the past 6-7 months, but with these recent developments, it begs the question: Is Antonio Brown trying to make it in Hollywood?  Let’s look at the facts:

In March, 2016, Antonio Brown joined the cast of Dancing With The Stars, a reality show in which celebrities, personalities, and athletes compete to be the best dancer in the world or something.  Antonio Brown made it to the semi-finals with Aussie Sharna Burgess.

Then earlier this year, Antonio Brown entered another ABC competition show, The Masked Singer, a show where celebrities, personalities, and athletes, wear mascot costumes like the Wake Forest Demon Deacon, or the Stanford Tree and sing songs

and then a group of other celebrities try to guess who is in these mascot costumes singing the songs.  Somehow it’s a competition.  I think if the guessing celebrities correctly guess who is “behind the mask” the person singing is shot on the spot or something.  Regardless of how the competition is run, he was on the show, during the Steelers’ stretch run to the playoffs.

After that, Antonio Brown demands a trade from Pittsburgh.  Not sure if you know this, but Pittsburgh is in the rust belt.  It is also a long way from from Hollywood.Screen Shot 2019-09-07 at 11.02.44 AMPlus look at all that road work.  You think he wants to take the daily commute from Pittsburgh to LA with TEN roadwork stops?  So then what happens you ask?  He gets traded or doesn’t get traded to Buffalo.  Buffalo is even further away from SoCal.Screen Shot 2019-09-07 at 11.05.27 AM.pngAnd whether or not the trade actually happened, Antonio wasn’t having it, at all.billstrade.jpgI mean could you imagine if your employer told you that you were getting transferred to another branch and you were just like “yeah no that’s not happening.”  Back to Antonio though, he finally gets traded to Oakland.  Oakland is MUCH closer to LA than Pittsburgh AND Buffalo.Screen Shot 2019-09-07 at 11.10.54 AM.pngAnd where are the Raiders moving to next year?  Las Vegas.  A city EVEN CLOSER to Los Angeles.  Screen Shot 2019-09-07 at 11.12.13 AM.pngNow we’re cooking with gas.  So after he gets to Oakland things simmer down.  But then Antonio finds himself out of the spotlight for a while until it’s announced that Hard Knocks will be following the Raiders.  This is his chance.  Antonio, who wants to produce and possibly star in dramatic films, sees this as his chance to really show off his acting abilities.  So what does he do?  He drums up all this drama about using a ten-year-old helmet that fits his head better than the new ones.  It’s all over the media, but unfortunately Hard Knocks doesn’t really show any of the his dramatic acting.  This infuriates Antonio.  This was his big break.  So what’s his next play?

That’s right, he starts calling old white men “cr*ckers.”  More drama.  More exposure to Hollywood.  After that he knows he needs to really bring it for his apology.  He works up some tears for an emotional “I’m sorry” to his team, his coaches, his fans, his franchise.  Everyone.  He pulls out his best Jerry Magruire and admits he fucked up and that the he always wanted to be a Raider.

But hours later, he releases a video on YouTube that looks like it was edited by ESPN, Dicks Sporting Goods, Gatorade, and Paramount Pictures:

What’s the central idea of this unbelievably well produced video?  That Antonio Brown is more than just a football player.  What does this video prove?  That he is more than just a football player.  He is also an actor, producer, and director.

When he releases the video and sees all the praise he’s receiving for the video quality (note: he is NOT receiving praise for the timing of the video), he knows that this is his chance to leave football, pack his bags, and head to Hollywood.  And that’s when he asks for a release.

So you see, Antonio Brown is not just a diva wide receiver.  He’s not a guy who has a fucked up head from taking blow after blow to the dome for the last decade.  No, he’s just a regular guy, like you and me, going through a career crisis and in need of a change.  And I, for one, applaud his bravery for taking this huge leap of faith.

@WhatAKetchWCS

Advertisements